We’re now in full summer mode which means the holiday season and a traditional time for a break from work.
But is it?
Are you one of those people who turns off your computer, says goodbye to the staff at the office – if you’re not working from home, that is – and heads off for a one- or two-week break without a care in the world?
Or are you the other sort who theoretically leaves but can’t quite say goodbye? Do you sneak a look at your work emails and fret, worrying that there’ll be too much to do when you return or – worse still – that a colleague/competitor might have shown you’re more than irreplaceable and be manoeuvring into your workspace while you’re trying to sun yourself on a crowded beach?
Research into the work/life balance a while ago suggested some bosses of the big tech companies, as well as other publicly listed firms, were owed more than a year’s vacation in time untaken. That seems careless. Maybe they would argue they were doing something they loved so didn’t feel the need for time off. Or maybe their day-to-day office life was pretty much what we “ordinary” mortals might see as a holiday.
Even so, imagine if you’re for ever gallivanting about on a luxury yacht. How long do you think you’d last? I can see it might be heaven for a week or two, or even a month or two but, speaking personally, I’d probably start looking forward to going home after a while. Perhaps even developing a longing for some terra firma under my beautifully painted toenails after I’d done all the whale and dolphin watching I could manage.
It’s about change, you see, and needing to do something different in order to refresh our inner selves and prepare us for the coming autumn and winter months.
In times past, most of us were not lucky enough to have time off for holidays. There was no money and, until the industrial age, we were chiefly agrarian workers. We had the seasons to guide us and our occasional day-off festivals – think Christmas and Easter – and that was that. No privileges for us.
Now, most of us are in a better position and we do get the chance to take a complete break away from it all.
Or we did, until smart phones appeared.
I remember going on holiday to Greece with friends in 2007 or 2008 and one girl had an Apple iPhone. We were amazed when she told us she could receive emails wherever she was. We couldn’t believe it, and we were so envious. I’m not entirely sure I even had a mobile!
And now, not even 20 years on, we all have them, and we’re glued to them. Heads down, headphones on and off we go. All connection with the outside world lost and completely in our own headspace. We don’t even have to worry about the cost of calls. If we’re on WhatsApp, they’re all free.
In some ways, this is brilliant. I love seeing snippets of friends’ lives through social media and personal messages and I know it’s a lifeline for some who are isolated. I’d say it enlivens some people and connects the lonely with some form of the outside world.
So, while this interconnectivity is clearly beneficial to some members of our society, what about others? Has it helped them? Are we always better off with 24/7 connections to our home bases.
Well, that seems like a tricky one. We can’t put the genie back into the bottle so there’s no point worrying but, to continue with the metaphor, we can become aware of how much use we’re making of the genie and whether or not even genies deserve respite.
In other words: When we go on holiday, is it a) better for us to take a complete break from home; b) occasionally tap in to social media but try to remain aloof for the time you’re away or c) just see it as an opportunity for relaxation (but not relocation) believing that a change of scene is all that’s needed?
I’ve noticed a connection between clients presenting with anxiety and how they tell me they often first notice the problem because of their work. Then there is a gradual increase in the level of anxiety until it permeates into other areas of their life, most notably the home environment. And that’s when they decide they need a bit of outside help.
This is where that very complicated term “boundaries” comes in. For me at least. I do sometimes feel we live in a world where the use of a “boundary” could be interpreted as plain rudeness but, when it comes to work/home divide, boundaries are good.
If we go on holiday clutching our laptop at worst or our combined work/home smart phone at best, we’re in danger of blurring the two. Who can resist a sneak peek at one’s office emails? We tell ourselves we’re just “checking”, but I don’t see how we can stop there. Emails are often pinged off by senior staff and line managers and often contain instructions. Even those that say: “For when you get back” don’t mean it and then, before you know it, you’re finding a quiet corner away from the family and feeling those familiar tummy somersaults as the angst takes hold.
My advice is to leave the work life at home. Buy a “burner” or, if that feels too dangerous, organise a separate folder where the work emails are immediately directed.
Put the “out of office” sign on (you can do that for friends too if you’re feeling brave) and switch off. After the initial “what if” concerns, you’ll get used to being without. Trust me, you will notice a difference in how you feel.
Enjoy that brief time of living in the moment, wherever it may be. Happy holidays!